The Market

[INTRO — Sunny market ambience, chatter, footsteps, rattling carts. A funky bass and Accordeon starts playing. Ska guitar joins. Bongos and cowbells enter. Brass section warms up.]

[Spoken Words — FRUIT SELLER, loud and cheerful]
FRESH FRUIT!
FRESH FRUIT!
ONLY SLIGHTLY RADIOACTIVE!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
How slightly?!

[Spoken Words — FRUIT SELLER]
Depends on the weather!

[BRASS BREAK — Comical Accordeon blast, trombone slide, bouncy tuba riff]

[Spoken Words — TOOL MERCHANT]
BEST TOOLS IN TOWN!
HAMMERS! WRENCHES!
THINGS I DON'T EVEN KNOW!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
What's that thing?

[Spoken Words — TOOL MERCHANT]
Twenty caps!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
But what does it DO?!

[Spoken Words — TOOL MERCHANT]
Thirty caps!

[INSTRUMENTAL — Funky ska groove, brass answers with cheeky staccato riffs]

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE, alarmed]
HEY! HEY!
THAT KID STOLE MY APPLE!

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO, relaxed]
Nah, they're just playing.

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
Oh. Right.

[Short pause]

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE, louder]
WAIT!
MY HAT'S GONE TOO!

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO]
Playing.

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
AND MY SHOES?!

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO]
...Very talented children.

[BRASS SECTION — Huge comic trombone fall, rapid Accordeon flourish]

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO, shouting]
JUST PLAY ALONG!

[CHANT — CROWD, rhythmic singing, short and punchy]
HEY! HEY!
PLAY ALONG!
HEY! HEY!
ALL DAY LONG!

[INSTRUMENTAL BRASS BREAK — Wild Balkan Accordeon, tuba bass, ska guitar, congas, handclaps, no vocals]

[Spoken Words — CHICKEN SELLER]
FRESH CHICKEN FIVE CAPS!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
TWO CAPS!

[Spoken Words — CHICKEN SELLER]
TEN CAPS!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
THAT'S MORE THAN BEFORE!

[Spoken Words — CHICKEN SELLER]
Premium chicken!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
What's premium about it?!

[Spoken Words — CHICKEN SELLER]
IT CAN DANCE!

[Spoken Words — CUSTOMER]
Prove it!

[INSTRUMENTAL — Ridiculous dancing chicken Accordeon riff, funky bass, cowbells, crowd laughter]
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult]
[Spoken Words — ADULT, theatrical outrage]
MY HAT!
YOU LITTLE BANDIT!
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult]
[Spoken Words — CHILD]
Catch me if you can!


[INSTRUMENTAL — Fast playful chase groove, Accordeon racing, trombone slides, handclaps]
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult]

[ADULT CHANT — CROWD, joyful rhythmic singing]
WHAT'S GOING ON?!

JUST PLAY ALONG!

WHERE'S MY STUFF?!

IT'S IN THE SONG!

HEY! HEY!
PLAY ALONG!
HEY! HEY!
ALL DAY LONG!

[INSTRUMENTAL — Big celebratory funk solo, wild Accordeon, ska guitar, Latin percussion, cheering market crowd]

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
Hey... where's my apple?

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO]
On your head.

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
...Oh.

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO]
And your hat?

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
On the donkey.

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT TWO]
And your shoes?

[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE]
...The donkey's wearing those too.

[IMPRO SECTION — Comical dramatic fanfare]
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult]
[Spoken Words — CHILD]
[CHILD] HEY, YOU!
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult, Spoken Words — CHILD]
[CHILD] WANNA PLAY?!

[FINAL INSTRUMENTAL ESCALATION — Explosive Balkan brass, funky ska bass, Accordeon and trombones trading solos, congas, timbales, clapping, laughing, dancing, chaotic joyful street festival]

[CHANT — ALL, ecstatic, rhythmic]
HEY! HEY!
PLAY ALONG!
HEY! HEY!
ALL DAY LONG!

[INSTRUMENTAL OUTRO — Huge playful brass finale, stomping crowd, cowbell, one final absurd trombone slide]
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult]
[Spoken Words — MERCHANT ONE, distant]
...WHO STOLE MY COWBELL?!
[Ensure the correct assignment of ADULT and CHILD, CHILD spoken by a Child, ADULT spoken by an Adult]
[Spoken Words — CHILD, distant]
[Child] JUST PLAY ALONG!

[END — One final tuba honk]