EVIL AND GOODNESS

They've done so much evil to me... They made me be born to have to face the world and come to life. And then they took my bread and clothes away, just to make me feel hungry and cold. They've done so much evil to me... They stole my marbles and cut my kite in the air. My top broke in half and my sock ball tore. They've done so much evil to me... My knee bled on the gravel to pay for childhood sins. They punished me at school, face in the corner, for a bad job.

They've done so much evil to me... They arrested me for jumping over a wall and stealing ripe fruit, ruining it on the tree. They left me naked, just so I wouldn't move to the Paraíba River and play with fish. They've done so much harm to me... I had to kill the little pig and the chicken that I raised to make food. My pet mare became a bicycle, which became my father's money.

They've done so much evil to me... They kicked me out of my motherland to a bad, stepmother city. My childhood friends grew and changed so much that I lost them. They've done so much harm to me... They took away my music and my inspiration. The poetry stayed in the guitar drawer. I lost jobs, addresses, references...
Books, records, family members are gone.

And in the restrained silence so as not to scream, I always heard a whisper in reason: “Don’t care. You will get stronger. And with your strength the world will bow.” I then had wonderful women. I gave myself up and dedicated myself to them. I was betrayed and hurt mercilessly. I couldn't die. I just got stronger.

Evil into evil, I grew. And crystallized in fearlessness to fight, I remembered to warn the voice that I would never want to be strong. I just wanted to be happy. I didn't want the world bent, tamed. I wanted a place to love and be loved. And since I decided not to turn the other cheek, I retreated to a corner so I could cry.

And, still, full of wisdom, of the lucid old men, without anyone to pass by, I let myself be carried away, floating in my thoughts, until I discovered the secrets of happiness. Laughing at what's going on and ready for what's coming, I became painless with memories of evil. I healed myself by understanding that unhappy is someone who has nothing to remember or lose.

Scenes passed from mind to consciousness, searching for me in the past, shared by several auxiliary egos, represented in my own, stronger personality. I played at being the protagonist of myself, very alert, reversing my roles, looking at myself in a mirror, in a dramatization, never experienced before in my life.

The discovery that, opposing evil, was my experience with gentleness. I looked at myself with other people's eyes and I could see myself, happy with the kindness that emanated from me. I cried with joy at the pleasure of so much forgiveness. I understood what my inner voice was saying. I was big in my way of being. And very happy because I had accepted me as I was.