It was just a little wiggle in the middle Of the room and I never stood chance Mister Felix had a Kleenex and he's Mean as fuck but the little wiggle Of his jiggle is anything but Easy peasy lemon squeezy To not let him steal your heart Only the lonely ones Can manage not to hear his loud ass bark Because Felix is a good boy Yes he is Felix is a good old boy oh yes he is He likes to run and play Oh well that's because he's gay oh yay Ohhhhhh woahhhhh yes he is Woah Felix is a good puppy doggy Yes he is There's not a chance that his pants Can't prance around dance or can't See another animal without freaking out He'll smother another younger pupper Holy wars weather the old beagle snout Laminating profit making taking Trivial monumental currency exchange Era of a destination greed breed and fees To the endless tailor-made mad made Renegade made hate take the money And the honey a temporary Band-Aid Well my friends I must dividend the red Blood the coarse through my veins Please take this gift from me my friends My life's now complete I approach the end But no shame or blame here my friend I sit and admit there's nothing better then Being right here with my dog Felix My best friend